Department of Motor Vehicles

Name of person featured: Linda Lethargy

Business: Department of Motor Vehicles

Address: Highway 58, Courtland

Phone number of business: Don’t bother, we won’t pick up.

Operating hours: Whenever you are working and can’t come, right up until 5 minutes before you can come.

E-mail address: werlllysuk@dmv.gov

Nature of Business: Torture, Non-humorous sarcasm, line forming, making life miserable

Owner: Uncle Sam

Year Founded: Whenever the lightbulb came on that we need new taxes and stupid fees.

Number of employees: One per 100,000 drivers

How’s business going: Great! You have to deal with us, you have no choice.

One thing you wish everyone knew about your business: You won’t win, so stop trying.  And, we pride ourselves in always giving you another form to fill out.

Something you offer that a customer won’t find elsewhere: Legal license plates, horrible photography

Your role model (in business or in life generally) and why:  Madea, her influence stays with me every day.

The key to a successful business is: Finding something to do that requires everyone to abide by, make it as inefficient as possible, charge whatever you feel like, and have no repercussions because, let’s face it, you have no competition.

Your best advice (in business or in life generally):  Take a number and sit your behind in a chair.