Name: Robin Cradle
Age: 45 (Okay, really 59)
Occupation and title: Wood Splitter
People say I look like: A brown paper bag
Favorite movie of all time: “American Pie” – I love Stiffler’s Mom.
TV show I never miss: “Cougar Town”
The secret to happiness is: Spending time with men from another family
I wish I knew how to: Facebook, I’ve got tons of hot pics that are just dying to be uploaded
If I had to eat only three foods for the rest of my life, they’d be: Bananas, Hot Dogs, Bratwurst
Three words that best describe me: Freaky, Open, Available
One superpower I wish I had: Valtrex coursing through my veins
My most recent trip: To Hampton to ride the Bull at the bar
My life won’t be complete until: I get married men divorced
My friends think I’m: A lil’ skank
I really lose my cool when: I see a man dating someone his own age!
Favorite sports team: Washington State Cougars
Best life lesson I’ve learned and who taught you: My aunt always told me, “Pick ‘em before they’re ripe; the greener the banana, the harder it is”
What gives me the blues: Sagging